Thursday: Three Morning Takes

Following Democratic Senator Elissa Slotkin’s leaked admission that she wants to prosecute minor staffers around Trump in order to — she said out loud, to an audience of other humans — scare young people away from working for Republicans, Kara Swisher took to the chardonnay-fueled hysteria happy hour she runs with that bald loser who demanded prison for the DOGE boys last year, and casually talked through Elon Musk’s future imprisonment under a hypothetical Democratic House and Senate. Missing from these conversations was, of course, discussion of actual crime, which in our hyper polarized political environment is no longer something partisans even pretend to care about. Yes, Democrats trying to jail Trump (after jailing his allies) while he ran for president was insanely destructive. Yes, Trump then chasing his political rivals co-signed a now irreversible trend. But going after citizens merely working for people you hate? Put down the bottle, ladies. The republic won’t survive.

After thirteen years of waiting, GTA VI is set to arrive next month and over a million Americans are forecast to call out sick when it drops. Economists are actually predicting this could cause America’s GDP to take a $1 billion hit on its release day, according to International Business Times. I hate to sound the alarm but the effect this game will have is being severely underestimated. GTA VI has been so hyped at this point that it’s expected to be nothing less than a digital fentanyl black hole, and according to my calculations, gamers will cross its event horizon and never return to work. Don’t go outside either — DoorDash drivers will be driving recklessly to deliver pizza to couch-locked gamers. Even accounting for GDP gain from delivery drivers working overtime, we are still looking at a 2008-style crash times a million. President Trump: fortify GameStops and order a shelter-in-place on November 19th. For safety purposes, obviously.

Hims, the telehealth company that conveniently offers both hair loss treatments that nuke your libido and boner pills to address the erectile dysfunction, is reportedly adding a new medication to the menu: straight testosterone. The direct-to-consumer platform is rolling out two different types of injectable treatments, as well as an oral pill, all in hopes of tackling the epidemic that is nationwide low-T levels (and it is an epidemic, Google “Mamdani bench press”). However, unlike its boner pills, the company won’t be shipping the treatment to any average Joe / effeminate mayor who fills out a questionnaire: because testosterone is a controlled substance, patients must first complete a video call with a physician, and, notably, Hims is only offering its TRT for “cisgender men.” Tough break for the trans community who would love easy-access internet hormones… but I don’t think the company wants to be held liable for school shootings? (Don’t come after me, I’m just reading the news!)

Jonas Du

One Man’s Quest to Build a Very Small Data Center on a Remote Plot of Sand

strata founder david meyer recently embarked on a “listening tour” through rural colorado in hopes of building what might be the most reasonable data center project in america: a dozen shipping-container-sized boxes on a remote plot of sand. no water. no noise. the local electric co-op even said the project would lower power bills. you might expect the approval process to be fairly straightforward here... what followed was anything but. jonas shadowed david throughout the founder’s arduous quest, delivering this eye-opening, on-the-ground dispatch

Nicole Wizman

San Francisco’s Hot Girl Bubble

multiple sources reported to us that gorgeous women are flocking to the city of san francisco. nice! but before you celebrate a city of 5’s now being flooded with 9’s and 10’s, stop and consider: could this be a worrying sign for the economy? as nicole notes, perhaps companies that are flush with venture cash paying baddies to woo business prospects is... a pretty good sign we’re in a bubble. an important analysis (disclaimer: not financial/relationship advice)

G. B. Rango

Did This AI Research Breakthrough Just Avert the Apocalypse?

could we prevent AI from wiping out humanity if we... simply understood how it works? in a landmark essay, former openai researcher nick cammarata argued that understanding AI’s ‘reasoning’ is more possible than we previously thought. but does this mean it’s easier to control? safetyists like eliezer yudkowsky still aren’t convinced. our boy g.b. breaks down the new findings and the ensuing debate over AI “interpretability”